Like that I gave it up
withdrew my wrestling techniques
learnt over many summers
and it was hard to swallow.
Held off the sticky touch 
of eyes and eyes across coffee 
up in his room because it’s better 
not to smoke in the kitchen
after a tidy date. 
Like a long haul driver
retiring, parking his machine for the last time.
Not to feel the engine shudder beneath
to know how the load fits around tight bends.
He turns to me 
wondering if I’d like to stay
I smile politely 
after peeking at his neatly laid bed
on my way back from the loo.
it would smell better if I did
in the morning
when the alarm shakes my pillow
or his
to crease the starch
scrape the layers off his back
to be that unforgettable one
that the flat mates would role
eyes about over toast.
He lit a candle 
the light lifted my eyes
to make me infinitely more attractive
I catch the last bus home.

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