Now I am completely alone I can have no excuses. Last night for the first time in a long time it feels, I had the notion of being completely independent. Something that I have been fighting for for years. I am a woman and this is my world. I guess this feeling is very temporal but it gives me the realization that I am doing the right thing.
Even if I did try and arrange a booty call at four in the morning with someone very inappropriate. It was dark and cold, and that's what you do when the weather gets this way. It's not my fault, honestly!
I've recently made friends with this stunning young woman, she is glamourous and exciting, everything that I wish I could be. So we went out, all night, running through the streets, dancing, smashing glasses and being generally outrageous. Does it matter that I have a bit of a crush on her?
Not sure with that one, I mean it's probably the program that is testing me, making me jump for anything where possible. We were dancing in this bar with her friends and her boyfriend, the music ran through me, infecting everything and the lights cut through the sound. Suddenly it was just me and her, surrounded by noise and darkness, she had a hold of my hands and we were rushing through the sound. We could have been super heros, we could have been anything.
I couldn't take my eyes off her. She was beautiful, magnificent, she was trapping me in a world that I had never been. I wanted every part of her, everything. And the music and the light and the darkness and everything was consuming me, and I it.
Then out of the corner of my eye I could see this face, not sinister, but smiling. Her boyfriend reached in and grabbed each of our hands and sped us out of our dark universe as fast as we came into it.
And the feeling diminished, and we drank the rest of the gin.
No comments:
Post a Comment